We Do What We Want

Maureen’s divine cockapoo, Ms Pietersons, loves to come shopping up the High Road. There’s no way on earth that we would leave her outside on her own, so wherever we go, in she comes and we will walk around confident and inwardly defiant in case a kerfuffle erupts. Today we took her in to Starbucks, where she was received well by the staff, who had dogs themselves it turned out and it was okay with them. We then had to go to McDonalds to get Maureen’s dad Edmund a quarter pounder with no cheese, which he insisted would be fine heated up in the microwave at least an hour after purchase. So handing the lead to me, we walked up to the counter with our furry friend, where we stood with about three other people, who didn’t seem to give a shit that there was a dog in store. After a few minutes she was spotted by ‘Store Shift Manager’, Kelvin, who said, ‘Can you take the dog outside?’ ‘No’, I replied, ‘We can’t leave her out there, she might get stolen and fed to pit bulls’, ‘Okay’, said Kelvin – I think he must have originated from the Caribbean – ‘Only my line manager might see it on the camera.’ ‘Never mind’, I said, ‘Pretend to tell me to leave and I’ll say no’, so we enacted it in mime form for the camera and Ms Pietersons enjoyed her meal at the table … well, we couldn’t resist a little burger while we were there, be rude not to.



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